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Tales from Bizzaro World

May 30, 2018 Filed under: Leave a Comment

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[*** Satire Warning ***]

New from Anaxios Press;

“The Wisdom of the Mlado-Startsi of BIZARRO WORLD”

This collection, modeled on the collections of stories from the Desert Fathers is designed to give the reader insights into what it is like to be an Orthodox Christian in a world that just isn’t quite right.

Here is a selection (from Chapter Three: On Communion; page 137):

Back in the day, in a village down the road, there was a deacon who had to rush to an appointment right after serving Liturgy.  He quickly (but reverently) consumed The Gifts and hit the road.  An officer pulled him over, tested him and his blood, and then arrested him for DUI.  The deacon used his one phone call to call his bishop.  He told his bishop what had happened and asked him to come bail him out.  Not only did the bishop refuse, he excommunicated him for his lack of belief.

A similar thing happened to another deacon in the neighboring village.  It was late in the evening and the deacon had to leave right after Liturgy.  He quickly (but reverently) consumed The Gifts and hit the road.  He too was arrested for DUI and used his one phone call to ask his bishop to come bail him out.  His bishop berated him for his dangerous stupidity, but bailed him out and allowed him to continue serving.  But then again, he was a Russian deacon and it was a Presanctified Liturgy.

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